Just got off a coaching call, my client was feeling incredibly guilty about “not doing anything” since we talked. She’d made a number of marketing commitments for the week and hadn’t followed through.
First, I should let you know that, as always- she had done a few things; she never actually “does nothing”. But the main point is that she was stuck on “why didn’t I do…” and that’s what she wanted to talk about. (clients define their objectives for a coaching call- you do all the work) Did I want to talk about that? Hell no, and I overruled her. Respectfully.
When you are in that spot and stuck on the “why” or “why not”- first reconfirm that the action is one you want to take, a worthwhile action. If it’s something you’re still committed to doing- then move into “how” and “when” mode. If there’s something about not knowing “how”- then address that. Talk to someone else, create a script, practice, use whatever resources you have to figure out “how”. If you have anything going on about doing it “right” or doing the “perfect” thing- ignore it. Then move into “when” mode.
Couple of choices- ideally- turn “when” into “now”. If possible, I’ll have my client hang up during our coaching session and take action immediately. That works very well for phone calls she’s promised to make. After she makes the marketing call, we continue our conversation. If “now” isn’t feasible, I’ll ask my client to schedule the action on her calendar and I make a note to be in touch on that date to follow-up. That creates a spotlight of accountability on the commitment. It works.
What if you don’t have a coach? First- keep your “to do” list clean. If there are commitments that roll, determine if they should be dropped entirely. If not- then bite the bullet and put them on your calendar on a “do or die” basis. Look at what you get if you take the action- and what the consequences will be if you don’t. (opportunity & potential revenue lost, in many cases) Beyond being accountable to yourself, make a pact with an associate or a friend and give them permission to follow-up. Make deals to support each other. Be merciless.
Whether it’s difficult performance feedback, marketing activities or preparing bills- if you catch yourself wasting time wondering “why” you haven’t done something- do it, calendar it, or drop it. Put a support mechanism in place and stay in integrity by following through on your commitments. The bottom line is that worrying about something is often more painful than doing it!
That’s it, gotta go, I have some marketing calls to make….and my coach is going to ask me about it today…
